The Dark Night

It is 2 o’clock PM Monday afternoon. It feels like it could be after 5 o’clock PM. I have been up since 5 o’clock AM this morning. I do not know why I got up so early? My problem is I do not do anything to make me tired. I should do some hard physical labor. I did hard physical work for 15 years and I am thankful now just growing fat and old. I am retired. But I do dream of being a long distance runner.

Carol and I took Rudy for a walk this morning at Window on the Waterfront. After walking Rudy we went to the local public library to return materials and to check out stuff. I renewed that biography on the life of John Cheever and checked out the new Prefuse 73 CD “Everything She Touched Turned Ampexian”. Carol checked out a mystery novel and some mystery DVD’s. We checked out the library used book room and I bought a used book on american history titled “The Glory And The Dream: A Narrative History Of America: 1932-1972″ by William Manchester. We got got a book “Boston” Lonely Planet for our Lonely Planet collection.

I do not know when I will get back to that Cheever biography? Maybe tomorrow, because right now I am wasted.

I thought of going for a walk this afternoon at the Upper Macatawa Natural Area, but I am too tired. What I should do is close down and take a nap. I am surprise that Carol has not gone to bed for a nap. Usually during the afternoon hours she sleeps.

Well after visiting the local public library this morning we dropped off Rudy at home and went to the grocery store. When we got home from the food store I lunch and looked through the September issue of Tabletalk. Now I am down in our basement writing some more Words listening to Prefuse 73 (in my music collection I have two Prefuse 73 CD’s). I am into noise.

I wanted to quote this afternoon a book titled “Paul’s Covenant Community: Jew & Gentile In Romans” by R. David Kaylor, but now I am too out of it. Maybe some other Time.

Well I will close to drift through Existence.

music: Prefuse 73 “Everything She Touched Turned Ampexian”

It is 1:54 PM Sunday afternoon in the flow of world history. I have been reading “The End of the Law” today and thought I would share this from this interesting book—

“Summary

Both the terminology and the context of the old versus new contrasts clearly reveal the eschatological nature of the contrast. First, the lexical study conducted above demonstrates that the terminology of “new” (kainos and neos) reveals that the contrasts in view are eschatological (qualitative), not merely temporal.

Second, the occurrences of the old versus new in Paul show that the old belongs to the old age and the new belongs to the new age. Romans 6:6 suggests that the old man is eschatologically old because the new eschatological Adam has come. Paul signals the eschatological advance in terms of the verb “abolish” (katargeo). Identification of the old or the new man remains in power. If Christ, the old man was crucified when Christ was crucified. Union with Adam or Christ determines one’s status. Moo correctly recognizes this dynamic: “These phrases denote the solidarity of people with the ‘heads’ of the two contrasting ages of salvation history.” [Douglas Moo "Romans" pg. 374].

Ephesians 4:22 demonstrates that the new identity is clearly one of eschatological newness because it does not depend on ethnicity or status or any other earthly classification from the old era. Colossians 3:9-10 further bears out this fact in terms that there is no longer any Greek or barbarian, slave or free in the new era. One crucial defining element of “old” and “new” concerns a fundamental shift in the way one regards relating to God.

The two Adam structure underscores the two races of humanity: the natural human being in Adam and the new human being in Christ. The two-age structure offers further commentary in terms of their respective spheres of existence. The old man in Adam exists in the old age of sin and death, while the new man in Christ exists in the new age of righteousness and life.

First Corinthians 5:7-8 also gives rise to an eschatological contrast because the new lump owes its existence to participation in the sacrifice of Christ. Believers must live in the light of the powers of the new age and become what they already are in Christ.

The advent of the new creation in 2 Cor 5:17 dictates that elements from the old creation go out of existence for those who are “in Christ.” The two-age/two-Adam structure explains the correlation between “new creation” and “in Christ.” Other scholars have also observed this structure.

Paul’s understanding of being “in Christ” is, perhaps, best understood in terms of two Pauline motifs: the Pauline conception of human solidarity that is seen most clearly in his discussion of the two Adams in 1 Corinthians 15 and Romans 5 and his concept of the eschatological contrast of the two ages.

Readers should also note the parallel nature of Paul’s two-age and two-creation theology in Gal. 6:15. An eschatological emphatic inclusion brackets the book. Galatians 1:4 proclaims a release from the present evil age in tandem with the death of Christ, while Gal 6:15 states that the new creation alone matters. Paul also uses the new creation to make the same point he made in other “old versus new” texts: circumcision and other factors no longer determine one’s identity (Gal 6:15). Paul was crucified to the world, and the world was crucified to Paul through the cross. Entities from the “old” creation like circumcision and uncircumcision do not avail anything.

The contrasts in Rom 7:6 also highlights key eschatological assumptions of advancement. The new age is an age characterized by the Spirit’s activity. Thus, the Spirit’s presence signals the advent of the anticipatory new age fulfillment. Moo summarizes the contrast in the same terms when he says that the antithesis is between “the Old Covenant and the New, the old age and the new.” [Moo "Romans" pg. 421].

In all these texts, Paul’s emphasizes the removal of or release from the “old things,” and the advent and continuation of the “new things.” These texts also imply that a release from the old is a release from sin and death, while entering or becoming the new results in righteousness, the bearing of fruit, and life. This analysis supports the conclusion that release from the “old things” is a release from the experience of the “old age,” which is characterized by sin and death and ruled by the old Adam, while entering or becoming the “new things” is entering the experience of the new age, which is characterized by righteousness and life and ruled by the new Adam.

“Third, this chapter supplies us with an underlying rationale for Paul’s contrasts. The structure of two ages and two Adams in Paul’s thought undergirds the antitheses that he formulates. This analysis paves the way for understanding the contrast between the old and new covenants as an eschatological contrast. Many of the features found in these Pauline antitheses will emerge again in 2 Corinthians 3-4.” pg.59-61 Jason C. Meyer

In the above quote Meyer quotes this excellent commentary on Romans “The Epistle To The Romans” [The New International Commentary on the New Testament] by Douglas Moo. I recommend highly Moo’s commentaries and writings. Moo’s also has these two other commentaries on The Epistle to the Romans (different formats)—

“Romans” [The NIV Application Commentary] by Douglas J. Moo

“Encountering The Book Of Romans: A Theological Survey” by Douglas Moo

I recommend this book “Law, The Gospel, And The Modern Christian: Five Views” Greg L. Bahnsen, Walter C. Kaiser, Jr., Douglas J. Moo, Wayne G. Strickland, and Willem A. VanGremeren. I highly recommend in this book Moo’s chapter ‘The Law of Christ As The Fulfillment Of The Law Of Moses: A Modified Lutheran View’.

It is 11:38 AM late Sunday morning. I took Rudy for a walk Kollen Park this morning. It was such a beautiful day I decided to go for another walk at VanRaalte Farm before coming home. Rudy would not come with me at VanRaalte Farm because of all the bugs flying around his head. So I left him in the car and went off into the woods alone with my thoughts.

Now I am home feeling hungry. I am trying not to eat a lot of food. I am trying not to always eat. I am always putting something into my mouth. I do not like to eat. I find no delight in eating. But I am thankful for food. The Lord is good.

Carol got home this morning around 8:35 AM. She has been in a sour mood lately. She is always telling me life sucks or life is dreary. What can I say to cheer her up when I basically agree with her. I am not Mr. Sunshine. I am all gloom and doom. But I do have a heavenly hope. “For God did not appoint us to suffer wrath but to receive salvation through our Lord Jesus Christ. He died for us so that, whether we are awake or asleep, we may live together with him. Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.” 1 Thess. 5:9-11.

I got up this morning around 6:24 AM. I made a pot of coffee and then messed with my computers. Next I read my Bible-the Book of Jeremiah/Old Testament. I wrote in my private diary and sought the face of God.

Last night I read “The End Of The Law: Mosaic Covenant In Pauline Theology” by Jason C. Meyer till Midnight. I also read last night a book titled “Inhabiting the Cruciform God: Kenosis, Justification, and Theosis in Paul’s Narrative Soteriology” by Michael J. Gorman.

Well I suppose I will close for Now to go search for something to put into my belly.

music: Modest Mouse “We Were Dead Before The Ship Even Sank”

Creatio Ex Nihilo
It is 10:53 AM Sunday morning. I wandered upstairs and found Carol had gone back to bed. Carol wants to get over her cold before going back to work tomorrow night.
This morning my mind has been on reading Theology. I recently bought these theological works for my library—
“Reformed Dogmatics: Prolegomena” Volume One by Herman Bavinck [John Bolt Editor & John Vriend, Translator]
“Reformed Dogmatics: God And Creation” Volume Two by Herman Bavinck
“Reformed Dogmatics: Sin And Salvation In Christ” Volume Three by Herman Bavinck
“Reformed Dogmatics: Holy Spirit, Church, And New Creation” Volume Four by Herman Bavinck
“A Sketch of the Christian’s Catechism” by William Ames (1576-1633) [Volume 1 Classic Reformed Theology]
“A Body Of Divinity; Being the Sum and Substance of the Christian Religion” by Archbishop James Ussher (1581-1656)
I always tell people I mainly read the Bible, but if you are a serious reader then you should read the best books. A Christian should read the best Christian books. It is good for ones soul to read Bavinck’s four volume “Reformed Dogmatics”.
I started reading Theology back in 1974. I read today Theology off and on. I love reading God’s Word more than theology.
Well once again I never got around to writing what was on my mind. I am a book worm. I spend my days reading books and wanting to buy more books. Next month there are a couple of used book sales for us to attend. Maybe I will find some gems to add to my book collection?
I do not know what to do with myself today, that is why I am sitting here in our basement talking to myself. I suppose I should just sit tight and not freak. I will close to face Time.
“How long is it since God did create the World?
Four thousand Years before the Birth of our Savior Christ: And about 5614 years before this time.
Why is the Order of the Years of the World so carefully set down in the Scripture?
1. To convince all Heathen, that either the World was without beginning, or that it began millions of Years before it did. 2. To give light to all Sacred Histories of the Bible. 3. To show the Time of the fulfilling of the Prophecies which God foretold.” Archbishop James Ussher
11:37 a.m. - 2009-05-24

God’s ray of light
The Light As The Fruit Of Faith
The evening goes by quietly and I am trying not to fall asleep. I have been in my study reading these two books “The Discourses” Symeon The New Theologian and “The Brothers Karamazov” by F. Dostoevsky. Bethany is watching television and my wife is sleeping. Here is a quote from “The Discourses”
“[ 6. THE EXCELLENCE OF THE ILLUMINATION OF THE SPIRIT.]
This young man had not observed long fasts, he had never slept on the ground. He had not worn a hair shirt, nor received the tonsure. He had not left the world in his body, but in spirit, after keeping but a few vigils; yet he appeared to be greater than Lot, who was so famous in Sodom (cf. Gen. 19). Nay, rather, though he was in the body yet he was an angel, held down yet not held down by it, seen yet not restrained, human in appearance yet in thought without flesh, in appearance ” all things to all men” (1 Cor. 9:22), yet alone to God who alone knows all things. Thus, when the visible sun sets, this sweet light of the spiritual star takes its place, as a pledge and confirmation in advance of the unceasing light that will follow on it. Rightly so, for the love of that which he was seeking took him out of the world and nature and all affairs, and caused him to belong wholly to the Spirit and to become light. It did all this to him while he was living in the midst of the city and was in charge of a house and cared for slaves and free men, was carrying out all the duties and activities that pertain to [ordinary] life.
But enough of this, whether to praise the young man in question, or to move us to love and imitate him. Would you rather that I told you even greater things, which you might not be able to accept? Yet what will you find that is greater and more perfect? Indeed, nothing else is greater, as Gregory the Theologian said: “It is written, ‘The beginning of wisdom is the fear of the Lord’ (Prov. 1:7). For where there is fear, there is the keeping of the commandments, there is the purification of the flesh, and from the cloud that besets the soul and prevents it from clearly seeing God’s ray of light. Where there is purification, there is illumination. Illumination is the fulfillment of those who desire either the greatest of all supremely great things, or even that which is above all greatness.” By this saying he showed that the illumination of the Spirit is the infinite goal of every virtue. He who attains of this illumination has arrived at the end and limits of all things that can be perceived and has found the beginning of the knowledge of spiritual things.” pg.247,248
We need to see Reality in “God’s ray of light”. We need to see God in His Light and not in the light of a system of theology.
It is very easy to sit down and read a book of theology but to live a life of prayer is not easy. God reveals Himself to those who seek Him in prayer. Do not neglect reading the Bible. We are to read our Bibles and then go to the throne of grace with our prayers. All spiritual experiences are to be tested by the teachings of the Bible. Also I am not against systems of theology if they are not held on the same plane as divine Scripture. We need to study our Bibles and not be all the time reading theology books. It amazes me to come across folks who can explain the Five Points of Calvinism, but can not give you an outline of the first five books of the Bible-the Pentateuch.
So here I sit tired and listening to Pulp. I do not know what else to do this evening. It is too cold to go anywhere. Well I will close to wander.
9:30 p.m. - 2003-01-22

an old diary entry on reading Reformed Theology
The history of Reformed Theology[ edit | delete ]
March 22, 2006 | At: 6:28 PM | Permalink
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an old journal entry I sent to Sarah yesterday to show her where I come from spiritually speaking [wrote this entry on 7/24/05]
joy to the world the King has come
It is 9:05 AM Saturday morning. I have been up since 8
o’clock AM. I went to be around Midnight. Before going
to bed I read some of the book “Jack’s Book: An Oral
Biography Of Jack Kerouac” by Barry Gifford & Lawrence
Lee. I got out these books to look at today—
1.”The Flowering of New England: Emerson, Thoreau,
Hawthorne and the beginnings of American Literature” by
Van Wyck Brooks
2.”Reformed Dogmatics: Prolegomena Volume One” by
Herman Bavinck (yesterday I ordered Volume Two
Reformed Dogmatics: God and Creation by Bavinck)
3. “A Theology Of Word & Spirit: Authority & Method In
Theology” [Christian Foundations] by Donald G. Bloesch
4. “God The Almighty: Power, Wisdom, Holiness, Love”
[Christian Foundations] by Donald G. Bloesch
Last night I looked at these books-reading the
material on Herman Melville
1. “God and the American Writer” by Alfred Kazin-chapter
4. “Melville in the Holy Land”
2. “Contemporaries” by Alfred Kazin
I do not remember what I did last night? I looked at a
novel I wrote 20 years ago. I read stuff on Melville
and Kerouac. I messed with the computer and listened
to music. I need to order another edition of the Works
of St. John of the Cross today. I need to pick up a CD
order at The Full Circle today. I want to order the
new Woven Hand CD “Consider the Birds” and the
Slowdive 2CD “Catch the Breeze” (right now I am waking
up to my sabbath day to Handel’s Messiah
“Messiah-Boston Baroque-Martin Pearlman Director)
I have these CD’s next to me this morning-
Joanna Newsom “The Milk-Eyed Mender”
Pearl Jam “reaviewmirror (greatest hits 1991-2003)
Pedro the Lion “Achilles Heel”
M. Ward “Transfiguration Of Vincent”
The Microphones “Live in Japan Feb. 2003″
Slowdive “Pygmalion”
I like to order these CD’s today when I am downtown
Holland at the Full Circle-
My Morning Jacket “Chapter 1: Sandworm Cometh”
My Morning Jacket “Chapter 2
Cocteau Twins “Victorialand”
Moose
Like to listen to music by these bands someday-Sway,
Silver Screen, Titania, Blue Boy and Lovejoy
Wish I had all the music of The House of Love on CD
instead of cassette. So much to read and so much music
to listen to-but I hear the voice of time calling me
to the grave.
At work yesterday I thought about all the theology
books I have read over the years. I am thinking I
might write out today the history of reading theology.
I like writing down my life since that is all I know
for certain in this world of shadows. I do not believe
in ghosts. I do believe there are demons (fallen
angels) active in the dead american world. We are to
put on the armour of God to protect ourselves from the
fiery darts of the Devil the deceiver.
So much to write and yet I know so few words to
describe it all. I am not a word smith. I am a man of
few words. I am not educated. I am a poor factory
worker hoping the Lord Jesus Christ will save my never
dying soul. I do not want to die and wake up in hell.
The main problem is writing down my theological
development is my library is downstairs in our open
basement-I have to carry up a TON of books if I am to
write it all down in detail-but maybe I could just
write what was in my Mind space yesterday as I hauled
egg carts in and out of the giant ice box. Why write
everything down when in the end who really cares? I am
writing for my own personal enjoyment not to gain the
popularity of the mob.
When I go back into my memory locating when I started
reading theology I go back to the days I lived in
Richmond Calif. when I worked and lived at the
Richmond Rescue Mission-what years was that? I think
the early or mid 70’s. I have a bad memory when it
comes to dates. Anyway I remember reading the writings
of A. W. Pink and being introduced to the writings of
the 17th. cent. English Puritans-getting into Puritan
Theology-reading William Bates, John Owen, Richard
Baxter and others. Around the times I was reading the
English Puritans I joined the Orthodox Presbyterian
Church in Berkeley, Calif. I started reading books by
B.B. Warfield the last of the great Princeton
Theologians-read book by John Murray-his book titled
“Redemption Accomplished and Applied” (I now have in
my library all the writings of B. B. Warfield and John
Murray). Next remember reading these theological
works-
“Systematic Theology” by R.L. Dabney
“Outlines of Theology” by A.A. Hodge
“Reformed Dogmatics” by Herman Hoeksema (Josiah has this
volume and needs to return it to me)
“Systematic Theology” by L. Berkhof (this theology book
was also my text book for my classes in Reformed
Theology when I was a student at Reformed Bible
College. In this fine book in the back is a
bibliography which I used to buy other books on
different doctrines like the doctrine of Christ or the
doctrine of Man etc. . .)
When I left Calif. and went to Reformed Bible College
Carol bought me when I graduated from college the
-also while in college I bought these Reformed
Theology works-
“Systematic Theology”-three volumes by Charles Hodge
“Lectures on Theology”-two volumes by John Dick (a
famous Scottish 19th cent. theologian)
“Dogmatic Theology”-four volumes by William G.T. Shedd
“Body of Divinity”-two volumes by the great Puritan
Baptist theologian John Gill
“The Collected Writings of James Henley Thornwell” (a
famous 19th cent. Southern Presbyterian theologian)
Over the years I have also bought these theological
works-
“Institutes of Elenctic Theology”-three volumes by
Francis Turretin
“The Christian’s Reasonable Service”-four volumes by the
great Dutch Puritan theologian Wilhelmus a Brakel
“The Systematic Theology of John Brown of Haddington”
“Theology For The Community Of God” by Stanley J. Grenz
“Reformational Theology: A New Paradigm for Doing
Dogmatics” by Gordon J. Spykman
“Systematic Theology: An Introduction to Biblical
Doctrine” by Wayne Grudem
I read theology for over 28 years and realized in the
end there are limits to what we can know about God. We
as finite sinful beings can not fully understand God.
His ways are past finding out. In the end all we can
do is adore God and not try to make Him fit our ideas
about what God should be like or do. As I was typing a
two volume work came to my titled “Sermons Of The Rev.
James Saurin-Late Pastor Of The French Church At The
Hague published in 1832-the volumes I have is falling
apart it is so old-but there are in volume one of
“Saurin’s Sermons” a series of sermons on the doctrine
of God-Sermon I. The perfection of Christian
knowledge. Sermon II. The Eternity of God, Sermon III
The Omnipresence of God, Sermon IV. The Grandeur of
God, Sermon V. The Greatness of God’s Wisdom, and the
abundance of his Power, Sermon VI. The holiness of
God, Sermon VII. The compassion of God, Sermon VIII
The Incomprehensibility of the Mercy of God, Sermon IX
The Severity of God, Sermon X The Patience of God,
Sermon XI The Long-Suffering of God . . .etc
The point is that Christians can know God and proclaim
that God revealed in the Lord Jesus Christ to lost
perishing sinners. Christians do not proclaim a God
wrapped in mystical darkness but set forth clearly in
His Word the Bible. We are to tell the world the Good
News of salvation. We are not to sit in our tombs
waiting for a vision of the Holy One but to go out
into the lost world and be salt and light. Is that not
what Christ Mass is all about Joy to the world the
King has come?
Well I need to take a break. I need to face my day of
rest.
10:27 p.m. - 2008-07-13

It is 7:52 AM Friday morning in the flow of existence. I got out of bed this morning around 7:10 AM. Carol left around 7 o’clock AM for a staff meeting at the hospital. I got up and made a pot of coffee. I then cooked myself two eggs to go on a english muffin. As I ate breakfast I looked through the morning newspaper. Now I am listening to quiet morning music writing down some words. Outside this morning it is cold, dark, and wet.

Last night Carol and I watched television and went to bed at 11 o’clock PM. Carol and I have been sleeping together for 30 years. Where has the time gone? Soon we will be sleeping six feet under waiting for the General Resurrection. I believe in the Resurrection of the dead. “For our citizenship is in heaven from which we also eagerly wait for the Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ, who will transform our lowly body that it may be conformed to His glorious body, according to the working by which He is able even to subdue all things to Himself.” Phil. 3:20,21.

music Kruder Dorfmeister “The K & D Session”

Yesterday was a super quiet day. I did not go anywhere yesterday. I read my books all day and then night came.

I have nothing to do today. It is too cold to go anywhere this morning for a walk. I will let Carol take Rudy for a walk when she gets home from her staff meeting.

Carol received an e-mail from Beth last night. Andy wants their wedding to be in the month of June 2010.

I wonder when we will have grandchildren? Someday I will be a Grandpa. Weird.

I read last night The Book of Jeremiah. Maybe I will be in the Book of Ezekiel soon? I can not remember the last night I read through The Book of Ezekiel? It is a blessing to be able to read the words of God. I often see myself with nothing but a Bible. Someday I will be a old man sitting in a bare room totally alone reading my Bible praying for the Lord to save us.

Maybe Carol will die first? Someday we will all be together in the Marriage Supper of the Lamb.

“1: And after these things I heard a great voice of much people in heaven, saying, Alleluia; Salvation, and glory, and honour, and power, unto the Lord our God:
2: For true and righteous are his judgments: for he hath judged the great whore, which did corrupt the earth with her fornication, and hath avenged the blood of his servants at her hand.
3: And again they said, Alleluia. And her smoke rose up for ever and ever.
4: And the four and twenty elders and the four beasts fell down and worshipped God that sat on the throne, saying, Amen; Alleluia.
5: And a voice came out of the throne, saying, Praise our God, all ye his servants, and ye that fear him, both small and great.
6: And I heard as it were the voice of a great multitude, and as the voice of many waters, and as the voice of mighty thunderings, saying, Alleluia: for the Lord God omnipotent reigneth.
7: Let us be glad and rejoice, and give honour to him: for the marriage of the Lamb is come, and his wife hath made herself ready.
8: And to her was granted that she should be arrayed in fine linen, clean and white: for the fine linen is the righteousness of saints.
9: And he saith unto me, Write, Blessed are they which are called unto the marriage supper of the Lamb. And he saith unto me, These are the true sayings of God.
10: And I fell at his feet to worship him. And he said unto me, See thou do it not: I am thy fellowservant, and of thy brethren that have the testimony of Jesus: worship God: for the testimony of Jesus is the spirit of prophecy.” Rev. 19:1-10

Well I will close to get ready for the Last Day.

music: Sun Kil Moon “April”

Jeremiah 31:27-40

“27: Behold, the days come, saith the LORD, that I will sow the house of Israel and the house of Judah with the seed of man, and with the seed of beast.
28: And it shall come to pass, that like as I have watched over them, to pluck up, and to break down, and to throw down, and to destroy, and to afflict; so will I watch over them, to build, and to plant, saith the LORD.
29: In those days they shall say no more, The fathers have eaten a sour grape, and the children’s teeth are set on edge.
30: But every one shall die for his own iniquity: every man that eateth the sour grape, his teeth shall be set on edge.
31: Behold, the days come, saith the LORD, that I will make a new covenant with the house of Israel, and with the house of Judah:
32: Not according to the covenant that I made with their fathers in the day that I took them by the hand to bring them out of the land of Egypt; which my covenant they brake, although I was an husband unto them, saith the LORD:
33: But this shall be the covenant that I will make with the house of Israel; After those days, saith the LORD, I will put my law in their inward parts, and write it in their hearts; and will be their God, and they shall be my people.
34: And they shall teach no more every man his neighbour, and every man his brother, saying, Know the LORD: for they shall all know me, from the least of them unto the greatest of them, saith the LORD; for I will forgive their iniquity, and I will remember their sin no more.
35: Thus saith the LORD, which giveth the sun for a light by day, and the ordinances of the moon and of the stars for a light by night, which divideth the sea when the waves thereof roar; The LORD of hosts is his name:
36: If those ordinances depart from before me, saith the LORD, then the seed of Israel also shall cease from being a nation before me for ever.
37: Thus saith the LORD; If heaven above can be measured, and the foundations of the earth searched out beneath, I will also cast off all the seed of Israel for all that they have done, saith the LORD.
38: Behold, the days come, saith the LORD, that the city shall be built to the LORD from the tower of Hananeel unto the gate of the corner.
39: And the measuring line shall yet go forth over against it upon the hill Gareb, and shall compass about to Goath.
40: And the whole valley of the dead bodies, and of the ashes, and all the fields unto the brook of Kidron, unto the corner of the horse gate toward the east, shall be holy unto the LORD; it shall not be plucked up, nor thrown down any more for ever.”

It is 10:01 AM Thursday morning in the flow of existence scream. I say all the time “existence is screaming by”. I see someone screaming when I think about existence. Life is a scream not a shout. Life is not a hoot.

I got up this morning around 6:30 AM. I do not remember why I got up. I do not like to lay in bed in the morning. My mind pounds when I am laying bed with weird dreams.

When I got up I walked to our kitchen and made a pot of coffee. I did not walk to a camp fire or a wood stove to make coffee. We have a coffee maker. I grind the coffee beans and put them in a filter and hot water pours over the smashed coffee beans. It is a blessing to have coffee.

After making coffee I sat in the living room morning dreaming. Around 7:01 AM I walked to the kitchen and got myself a cup of coffee and a english raisin muffin. I sat at our dining room table looking out our sun room window-it is a cold dark damp ugly morning. A good day for a hanging.

Carol got up around 7:30 AM. She left this morning to do errands.

I have nothing to do today. My wife said to me last night “I am living with a ghost”.

Yesterday I hardly remember. I wrote in my blogs, private diary and read my books. This morning I read The Book of Jeremiah and wrote in my private diary. I feel a constant compulsion to write it all down before I drop dead. The Lord will get the last word.

So here I sit writing at 10:11 AM listening to Pavement with cold feet (the window near me is open).

Well I will close to gather my wits.

“And you will seek Me and find Me, when you search for Me with all your heart.” Jeremiah 29:13

music: Pavement “Brighten The Corners: Nicene Creedence Edition”